What Are Love Languages?
Everyone needs to feel loved. It's vital to know how you enjoy being loved, but also how to
properly love others. A doctor by the name of Gary Chapman became famous when he
came out with a book called The Five Love Languages.
There is a basic breakdown of five different love languages to make it easier for us to
identify how to express ourselves to our loved ones. Once you've figured out what your
partner's love language is you'll be able to show them how you feel in a way that is
fulfilling to them.
For example, let's say that your partner likes to hear the words "I love you" often. Even
though they know that you love them, just hearing the phrase can brighten their day. But
perhaps you thought that you should express your love by buying little gifts. Your loved one
likely appreciates the gesture whenever you show your love, but at the same time it's not
their personal preference of how they like to receive love.
The Love Languages Explained
1. Words of Affirmation. Like the example above, some people just like to hear gestures of love such as "I love you" and "I appreciate everything that you do." For this type of person,
you'll want to provide constant encouragement, never letting things go unsaid.
• Try verbalizing your appreciations in some way each day.
• Don't assume your partner knows what you're thinking and feeling - speak up!
2. Quality Time. One of the love languages has to do with spending quality time
with your partner. This doesn't mean just casual conversation; it means the times
where your partner is your main focus. If your partner enjoys quality time, here
are some things to consider:
• Choose a certain time each day or week where you're completely dedicated to your
partner. This means that you need to shut off the TV, put down the paper, and take
some away from the kids.
• Think of activities you can do together to really connect.
• Make sure you have a good relationship with yourself; it's the only way you can truly
connect with your partner.
3. Receiving Gifts. Another love language is one where your partner may enjoy giving
and receiving gifts. This isn't because they're greedy; it means they're visual people
who enjoy seeing proof of your deepening relationship. If you're with this type
of partner, try these tips:
• Even if you're a big saver, make the effort to spend at least a little money or make
some homemade or handmade gifts.
• Leave loving cards and notes for them.
• Don't give gifts everyday, but give gifts that are meaningful.
4. Acts of Service. We can't forget the chores when it comes to a language of
communication between partners. Since there are many things that need to get done
around the house, it often causes problems when you try to figure out who's doing
what. Keep these tips in mind:
• Everyone has different chores that they deem important.
• Figure out which ones your partner doesn't enjoy and do them.
• Chores involve thinking ahead, which your partner will certainly appreciate.
5. Physical Touch. The physical affection love language can get complicated.
Expressing your love physically doesn't only mean lovemaking. It involves simple
touches too. Each partner will usually have some kind of opinion when it comes to
• Figure out which kinds of touches your partner enjoys, it may be a gentle rub of their
shoulders or some cuddling while watching television.
• This is equally important, figure out which touches irritate your partner.
• Get to know your partner's moods so you know when to express physical affection.
Your partner will likely speak a certain combination of these love languages. As
your relationship deepens, you'll get to know your partner better and better. It may even
help to outright discuss the topic of love languages with your partner to better understand
How do you express love for your partner? What's your favorite way to receive love? Let us know in the comments below!