When it comes to your marriage, it can be hard to set realistic goals. When you have high expectations, you are more likely to rise to the challenges of making a relationship work. But having unrealistic expectations could lead to disappointment and anger.
You might also want something different from a relationship than what you're willing to give. Taking care of a relationship over time is the best way to make it strong. If two people want their relationship to work, they need to be realistic and committed. Think about these tips to figure out what you and your partner can reasonably expect from each other.
Having fun together
The Office of National Statistics says that the average couple spends about two hours a day together, and a third of that time is spent watching TV. If you're having trouble meeting your goals, you might want to improve the quality and number of your interactions.
Here are some things to try:
Plan date nights. Make a point of spending quality time with each other. Take turns coming up with ideas for romantic and fun nights out.
Ask other couples to come. Find a couple whose relationship you like and get to know them. When you hang out with other married adults, you can learn new skills and learn to love your own partner more.
Seek balance. Even though it's important to spend time and do important things with your partner, you should also keep your own identity. Keep in touch with your family and friends. Give yourself a chance to like being with yourself. After that, you can tell your partner about these stories.
Skillful Communication
Communication is essential in any relationship. The foundation of your relationship is how you express your wants, needs, and desires and how your partner responds. Practicing both alone and with others can help you build your skills.
These strategies support effective communication:
Pay close attention. Listen to what your partner is saying. Even if you don't agree with them, you should acknowledge their feelings and experiences. resist the urge to talk over someone. Set up a place where you both feel safe enough to talk freely.
Resolve conflicts. In any close relationship, there are bound to be fights. If you deal with them quickly and politely, they can even bring you closer together. Learn to tell the difference between things you can change and things you just have to deal with. Be ready to ask for forgiveness and say you're sorry when you're wrong.
Express gratitude. Tell your partner how much you like and care about them. Sprinkle your daily life with small acts of love and kindness. When it's their turn, take out the trash. When they go on business trips, put love notes in their suitcase.
Talk about things that matter. It's easy to get stuck in a rut where most of what you talk about is home repairs and bills from the orthodontist. Don't forget to connect more deeply. Talk about the goals you both have. Tell your partner what they can do to help you when you're having trouble.
More Advice:
Consider your purpose. In the past, people who wanted to be financially secure or raise children sometimes had to get married. Today, your hopes may be more about finding a friend or making yourself happy.
Take care of yourself. Remember that your happiness and choices in life are up to you. Your partner can be helpful, but you have to be in charge of your own growth.
Work together. At the same time, having someone on your side can make it easier to reach your goals. Share chores around the house and work together as parents.
Put limits in place. Healthy couples set and keep clear boundaries. You have the right to decide how you wish to be treated and what the consequences will be if someone fails to respect your guidelines.
Accept change. Your marriage keeps evolving. You might be sad that the honeymoon is over, or you may be glad to discover a more stable and mature sense of intimacy. As needed, change your expectations.
Rethinking your expectations could lead to significant improvements in your marriage. Your expectations can make your relationship more fulfilling and joyful.